


lovingly.

by cultgoth



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Breakup, Dialogue Heavy, but not really, late night conversation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-24
Updated: 2018-09-24
Packaged: 2019-07-16 09:16:02
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 561
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16083074
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cultgoth/pseuds/cultgoth
Summary: for when the love that you recieve feels like too little.





	lovingly.

there's a banging on the door, it gets louder the longer it goes unanswered and its honestly starting to hurt his hand. it's three in the morning and he just wants to go home, but he can't—more like _won't_ —until stupid na jaemin opens the damn door. "jaemin!" he shouts, he tries to keep his voice quiet enough to keep the neighbors from fussing, but he was never too good at that so they do anyway. "jaemin!" he tries again, and this time it works because he hears a weak, "what do you want, lee?" the use of his last name makes donghyuck's heart feel weak. it reminds him of last month, under the bleachers where jaemin had smiled when they kissed; a gentle "i love you, lee." rolling off of jaemin's tongue and slipping into his own mouth. he can still fill the warmth on his skin, he shakes it off.

"i want it back." he keeps his held up high, despite the door being closed but suddenly it opens. jaemin is fully awake now. 

"what?" he's tired, his arms are crossed over his bare chest and donghyuck forces himself not to fall into those arms.

"all the love i gave to you, i want it back, i don't want it anymore." jaemin's eyebrows knit together, and he looks as though he's about to add another _what?_ before donghyuck steps in again, "i have yours right here, so just give me mine and i'll leave."

jaemin shakes his head, "i don't want my love back," he shakes his head again, "i gave it to you for a reason!" it's donghyuck's turn to shake his head, a frown etched onto his face. "lee, what is this even about?" jaemin's voice isn't as tired as before, it's apprehensive now yet somehow still bordering on demanding.

"i-i just want it back," 

"there has to be a reason,"

"no, there doesn't have to be a reason! sometimes you just feel like not wanting to be in love anymore!"

"but why? why now? why at three in the fucking morning?" his voice cracks halfway through but he ends with a laugh, it makes donghyuck want to cry but he's strong so he doesn't.

he looks at his feet and then back at jaemin, "i just don't want it anymore..." he says lamely, and suddenly he feels so stupid, it's late and they're both so tired and he just wants to crumble but he forces himself not to. but the way he's looking at him, like a kicked puppy makes it so hard not to. 

"why don't you want to love me anymore?" his voice is soft now, but it's also closer than it was before. there's a hand placed on his cheek and his eyes are blurry, all of this just makes him burst into tears. "i'm so sorry, i'm so sorry." he hugs jaemin, tighter than ever and it feels like it's for the first time. jaemin runs his fingers through his hair while still holding him close. and for a moment, they're one. they're both two tired boys, in the hallway of an apartment complex; crying. they're two boys, in a situation gentle yet unkind. 

"i love you." jaemin whispers in his ear, and donghyuck nods, he feels warm again. this time though, he doesn't shake it off.

"i love you too."

**Author's Note:**

> twt : neocu1t  
> cc : 66600


End file.
